Hot Flashes, Hot Mess, Hot Pants, and Hot Tamales. It has been so hot and humid in south Florida with SO many days of record breaking HEAT!; that it is difficult to think straight or crooked for that matter. Post menopause equals fuzzy thinking; coupled with the heat and there is very little creativity and thinking happening here at all.
Why am I still getting hot flashes? My gynecologist said that some women experience symptoms many years into menopause. I’m so lucky. I opted out early on from HRT. I have read a fair amount about hormones from the experts. I have changed my eating and sleep rituals to accommodate the hormonal shifts; though I still have that love affair with sugar.
Who stole my estrogen I ask? I want it back. Do I really? This morning I was reflecting on the fact that I probably have very few, if any eggs left. I need to go out and get more eggs. And of course my husband suggested I try the local market. Of course the desire to get more eggs is clearly a reflection of loss and acceptance of this inevitable change.
I love all of the conversations lately about menopause, and normalizing our discussions at work and in society, in general. Menopause is not good or bad; for me it was and is a place of reflection, change and nuanced or bold bodily changes. For example:
- Hair grows on places on my face that are not desired
- Bodily features change and go south
- Declaring out loud that I am a mid life woman who looks her age (because I’m going to live healthfully and joyfully until 120)
- Weight appears around the midsection almost overnight (I know ice cream does not help but sometimes a girl needs a scoop)
- An attitude of boldness emerges that I don’t have to prove shit anymore to anyone
- An ebb and flow thinking about aging and the biases I hold about my own age. (More about this later as I watched myself over the last year or so emerge from negative self talk that I have been there and done that, and that less is now available). I say now bull shit. I have refreshed opportunities as a result of my wisdom and experiences.
- No matter what red lipstick makes me feel alive
- Learning bodily acceptance and being comfortable with the changes (this is a hard one for me)
- Reflecting on my business model and going through the suggested steps that I offer so many of my clients to regain clarity and purpose. Am I bored? Do I need to do something very different or a slight variation of the theme? As many of us know, the work works.
- It is clear that I am not done yet. Yes I have less road in front of me, but boy it’s going to be filled with goodness, greatness, bumps, road blocks, challenges and opportunities.
Who Stole My Estrogen? 